I love Saturdays

I love Saturdays.  It is not because it is 9:30 AM and I am still in my loungewear, or that I got to sleep-in, it's not even the fact that I get to spend the day with my boys.  For me the joy of Saturday comes from the realization that for today, I won't get the call to come pick up my disruptive kids from school because they are behaving too badly or putting others in harm's way.  I won't get the call asking for my input into what is different, why they are doing what they are doing, what I think could make the behavior stop.  For today, the madness belongs just to me, and I embrace it because from the minute I got the news that both my boys were on the Autism spectrum, I accepted a certain level of chaos that most parents of "nuerotypical' (non-Autistic) children don't have to deal with.  I know a lot of parents have it worse than me, and there are billions of moments when I am in full realization of all my blessings, but after a really tough week, I decided it would be good for my mental health to have an outlet. 
My younger son, Zach, was diagnosed shortly after his third birthday, after a short and disasterous stint in daycare.  His aggressive, unpredictible behavior, coupled with a speech delay and short temper made for multiple calls to come pick him up from daycare, thus making my husband and I miss a lot of work.  Finally, we were told he would not be allowed to attend the center anymore, and recommended he be evaluated for Autism.  At the time, I knew little about the condition, and it only conjured up images of an extremely impaired person, most likely wheelchair-bound.  When I saw Jenny McCarthy speaking about her son, a light went on.  So many things began to make sense, he wasn't behaving badly out of spite, his senses were being raked over with razors.  The diagnosis gave us a good starting place, and when we moved to Wisconsin, he started Early Childhood at the age of four.  I have nothing but respect for the teachers and professionals who helped him, he made amazing progress.  Now he is in an integrated kindergarten, a classroom that has a mix of neurotypical and special needs kids, and his progress amazes me on nearly a daily basis.
My older son, Israel was diagnosed at the age of six, in first grade.  I have to give credit to the teacher who cared enough to dig a little deeper and not just write him off as a bad kid or product of poor parenting.  Israel has always been extremely smart.  He began speaking at 3 months and never looked back.  He has the most amazing, clever mind, and thinks of ways to use objects that I never would have thought of, and can create a Rube Goldberg design in mere minutes.  Every teacher who has worked with him has commented on how smart he is.  We never suspected anything was wrong with him because he was so verbal and smart, and he was nothing like Zach.  Then he started disrupting the class on nearly a daily basis, tapping his pencil, kicking his chair, humming loudly while the teacher was trying to instruct, rolling on the floor, hiding under his desk, even hitting, kicking, punching kids with seemingly no reason.  His temper grew shorter and his speech started to be interrupted by long pauses, almost stutter-like patterns, waiting for his brain to catch up so he could tell you what he was thinking.  After a long, trying year, he was finally evaluated and diagnosed as High Functioning Autistic.  The diagnosis helped explain a lot of his behaviors, and though it is not something any parent wants to be told,  it gave us the chance to move on. 
For Zach, the question of lead levels came up when he started acting so unpredictable at school, and he also seems to have a hearing impairment, and has very bad teeth.  This year when they were testing his high pitch noises at school, the area he seems to have trouble hearing, he started trembling, his eyes rolled back in his head and he was unresponsive for about 10 seconds.  When I asked him what happened, he said he heard a loud noise that hurt his ears.
For Israel, our challenge is never ending.   We are fairly sure he is ADHD, and it has made our lives particularily difficult.  The constant distractions at school, immediate and dramatic reaction and tantrums have made it extremely trying, and they don't end when his school day does.  The only thing that seems to calm him is caffeine.  So, after we get through some red tape with our insurance, we will have him diagnosed and medicated.  He is so smart, but he just can't keep focused long enough to show it or to learn.  Sometimes I wonder if he was mis-diagnosed, and truly only has ADHD.  Whatever the case, he is not medicated for the Autism, and if he does have ADHD, things will fall into place nicely once he is medicated.  I am not one of those parents who worries about medicating him, because I have seen him on caffeine and off, and he is miserable when he is not on caffeine.  He tells me how bad he feels, he calls it feeling 'wild', and he tells me, "I should be ashamed of myself!" and I feel so bad for him.  I tell him it is not his fault, that his body just needs something it doesn't have yet and that we will reach a solution together.  What else can a parent do? 
My kids are my the center of my world, and though we have challenges, I wouldn't trade my life for anything!